Soap operas

I only have two TV channels - ABC and CBS. So if I want to watch TV in the afternoon, the only available shows are soap operas. Today, I actually left the TV on during the afternoon while I wasted time online. After a couple of hours of being exposed to soaps, I no longer remember algebra.

So I suggest that the U.S. prison system should take away cable from the prisoners and instead force them to watch soap operas all day long. This will greatly reduce crime rates, since released prisoners will be incapable of doing anything more challenging than painting their nails and gossiping with their next-door neighbors.