The surprise attack of the cold

Until 3 p.m. today, I felt great. By 9 p.m. I felt like I'd been run over by a truck, had tampons shoved up my nose and hot-sauce covered fish bones stuck in my throat.

Undoubtedly, this will not vanish as abruptly as it showed up. I will suffer days of stuffy, headachy agony before it gradually fades away leaving me pasty, worn out and with a reduced tolerance for alcohol - something I really don't desire and certainly can't afford.