Wednesday, June 30, 2004

Left-handers and bed-wetting

According to this article linked to from Fark, lefties are more prone to depression, drug abuse, bed-wetting, autoimmune diseases, suicide attempts, and being president.

None of these sound very good. I am a happy, well-balanced lefty, without any major psychological or physical problems. I am also not the president. I suppose there is some truth to all this, but I tend to categorize such information as part of the giant anti-lefty conspiracy that pervades every facet of society.

Of course, there is also a very large market for left-handed devices - I own a pair of left-handed scissors which I find invaluable. Some of the available devices are, however, nothing more than sales gimmicks. For instance, I recall being in a left-handed store with my parents, where my mom was excitedly pointing to a pair of left-handed manicure scissors and suggesting that she buy them for me. I gently pointed out to her that this made absolutely no sense, since in order to cut all ten of your nails, you'd have to switch the scissors from one hand to the other, thus invalidating any left-handed properties that those scissors might contain.

I'm proud to be a lefty. Now excuse me while I go and change the rubber sheets on my bed.

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